As usual, my instant review of the Spanish Grand Prix is via the medium of quarks. It’s the only way to review a Formula 1 race, I think you’ll find.

Up

Jenson Button finally made an alternative strategy work! So many people have told him that he’s kind to his tyres, that he seems to feel the need to try to save a pit stop every race, despite the fact that it’s a strategy which has failed to work for him this year. The final podium position was his reward today, for blindly sticking with that strategy. Well done.

Down

Poor Mark Webber. Beating his team mate to take pole position was a great result, but he slipped straight back to P3 at the start, and then P4 after the first set of stops. Alonso dropped behind Webber, but Button got ahead of him at the same time, so 4th is where Webber finished.

Charm

It was a fantastic start for Fernando Alonso, scything through from P4 on the grid to lead after the first corner. Like just about everyone else using #BBCF1 on Twitter: I don’t much care for Alonso, but it was a storming bit of driving. He may not win us over with his personality, but it’s he does some good stuff on track.

Strange

There was more cryptic fun on the team radios, with McLaren telling Hamilton to use first the blue button, and then the yellow button in an attempt to pass Vettel for the lead. They didn’t tell him to use the Red Button though – presumably because, according to my TV, that would have switched him to ‘Live Tennis’.

Top

It was a close battle between Sebastian Vettel and Lewis Hamilton, Vettel marginally taking the win. It was a superb battle in the closing stages, Hamilton less than a second behind Vettel. Moreover it was a tense battle, since DRS and KERS might have given Hamilton a chance. They didn’t, but that’s not the point.

Bottom

The only thing that spoiled it was Vettel throwing in Flintstones and Crazy Frog impressions over the team radio after he passed the chequered flag. Idiot child.