A new term was added to the rich Formula 1 lexicon at the Turkish Grand Prix at the weekend: “magic paddle”.

It’s what Mercedes told Michael Schumacher, over the team radio, to use during qualifying. Cue much intrigue, discussion and speculation. In short: it was a lot of fun.

What a shame, then, that the teams almost universally resorted to rolling out unimaginative “plan B” messages in the race itself, to switch their drivers to a four-stop strategy. The jokes about the recording artist of the same name are getting tired; and Ferrari’s radio message to Alonso in Italian late in the race was of mild interest, but quickly decoded.

So let’s try harder, shall we?. F1 teams, you can have these for free:

Suggestions for cryptic F1 team radio messages

• Highest engine setting, richest fuel mix:
  

  WE’RE GOING TO DISNEYLAND!

• Conserve fuel and tyres:
  

  We’re going to Disneyland Paris

• Adding a pit stop to the race strategy:
  

  Do the hokey cokey

• Dropping a pit stop from the race strategy:
  

  The eagle has body odour

• Michael Schumacher is about to try to overtake:
  

  Shields to maximum

• About to be lapped:
  

  There’s somebody at the door! There’s somebody at the door!

  (skip to about 1:15)
  

Any more? Let me have the in the comments or on that there Twitter.